Ok so today was a first.  You see I was trying to make my followup appointment with my primary care doctor.  Lets call him Dr. House.  Trust me he does not have the personaility of Dr. House but he does have the ego.   Love him though.  He is very caring, and sensitive. That is why though going to see him could be a whole day event.   Anyways, my oncologist is asking for my liver to be tested.  They want to make sure I do not have cancer in the liver.  So I have been doing the ultrasound thing blood work thing.  Anyways, I went to call to make my follow up appointment as I need to have all of this done before I can move on to the next step of treatment.  I.E., "the womb removal"  on side note do you think the doctor will find cobwebs I mean my uterus is in all serious barren.  I know sick sick Dennise Stop the madness.. Oh just humor me...So the lovely recptionist informs me that she cannot make my appointment as I have an outstanding balance from last month.  My legal mind immediately went to "liability".  How can you refuse treatment to a client that you know has Cancer who needs to see her doctor for medical treatment.  But nevettheless I know doctors need to get paid just like everyone else but really I can't schedule an appointment.  Couldn't  I just pay the balance at the appointment which really is in only two days.  Her response was sorry but "NO"   so she transfers me to the billing personnel.  Here is where the problems begin...Let me paraphase the conversation if you will  The biling deparmtnets response is in bold.
"Hello"
"yes hi, I was transferred to you as it appears I have an outstanding balance and I need to make an appointment and they will not schedule it until I resolve whatever issue with you"
"sure you have a really high balance"
"really"
"oh yeah like a really high balance"
."OK"
"OK"
"would you like to tell me the balance and what is for"
"do you not know"
"um NO"
"why not"
Now this is where I began to pray to God" Please Lord forgive her and forgive me because I am going to say something really nasty..." I am sorry" 
""why don't you know"
""honestly, my husband handles the finances in my house...(accurate and nice)
"i see"
"well oh wait the insurance company has paid a large portion of that bill"
(Praise the Lord Halleuaha"
but you have a balance of 93.00 
Ok for what
for services rendered
( No I thought it was for the hell of it of  course it was for services rendered)
 what services...
your doctor's
(Now this is where I lost it...)
Look I have Cancer I see a lot of doctors who are affliated with your company so which doctor
Well let me check
Thank you
For doctor Londono
Ok for what services
a procedure
Ok again I have CANCER I have had a lot of procedure performed by Dr. Londono in his office, at the surgery center and at the hospital WHICH FRIGGIN ONE I need  to verify with the insurance companuy.
"i thought your husband handled the finances"
"OK look I am getting the information from you so I can pass it on to my husband and we can veryify with the insurance what they covered.  As you are aware there are different things they do and do not cover in regards to Cancer.  Can you just tell for what procedure, what date of service.
NO
NO
No I don't like your tone.
Oh I'm sorry you see I have CANCER I feel sick and I need to see my doctor I am trying to resolve the issue so I can see him but you are making it difficult.
AM NOT
What
You should pay attention to your bills. If you did you would be able to make the appointment
Um but isn't  it your job to collect the payment
yes
so if you want to collect the payment tell me what it is for and I will pay it.
93.00
yes but for what
a procedure performed by Dr. Londono
At this point I humg up.